Have I mentioned how much I love it here? How amazing it is to hear people complain about the hot weather (it hasn't even reached 80 F)? How beautiful are the grey skies and the tiny droplets of rain hanging on the metal railing of the fire escape? How I love the sun, because I know it won't be around to long, and I love the rain, because it never stays to bore me? Have I told you what it is like to be content in the middle of a whirlwind? To have peace in the heart of a storm? To know that I am in the right place in every way while my heart is wrung with pain?
There are many things I don't understand and even more that I simply don't know. There are many things that I fear, asserted truths that I doubt, actions that I regret, and events that I dread, but none of these emotions has power over me - not real power, not in the long run, not while I am upheld by the prayers of countless friends, safe in the arms of Jesus. Soulquake, shock and fire, the slice of a knife across my being, but perhaps it only opens the wound for a proper healing, a wound that was always there, I simply didn't know it.
Night is falling, the long, slow twilight of a Welsh summer evening. I marvel at the daylight that lingers on nearly to 10 pm, and I think of the long winter evenings to come, dark from half-past-three. I love them both, as I love the sun and the rain, the clouds and the blue sky, the wind that is never silent, but do I love Wales because of these, or do I love them because they are Welsh?
Home is where the heart is, and my heart is here, my peace is here, my joy is here. Home, in Wales.
1 comment:
Thank you for this post Robyn. What you posted today is how i feel about four times a year.
You write: "To know that I am in the right place in every way while my heart is wrung with pain?"
That is me way more often than i'd like it to be. The heart of your post sums up life perfectly, but perhaps it sums up the human condition as well?
Post a Comment